Image by Sivani Bandaru
Ah… the Gripes of Cath. We all seem to know someone who steps up to help on a project without being asked. Wonderful!
However, despite the positive value they may bring to the project, if their assistance seems to come with strings attached, beware. After helping, they openly announce what “this will cost you.” Or that they “will never let you forget it,” (or anyone else either, for that matter.) Etc. They may even make it clear that you could never have done it right without them. (Oh, joy!)
This behavior is called all sorts of things…. Manipulative, self-serving, and controlling are just a few of the words that come to mind. I have often found that I learn the most about behavior and actions by observing what NOT to do and taking great care to not emulate the choices that I observed as negative.
I believe we do best when we step up to help someone else with no thoughts, never mind expectations of what they can do for us in return. This reflects friendship, kindness, and respect.
