Okay! It’s Friday… Date Night! For us that has often meant a trip to Home Depot, where we find ourselves so often, the staff calls us by our first names. We can do better for a Date Night…. For example, even when we must go to Home Depot, we can plan a little out-do-dinner stop afterward… or even just grab an ice cream cone.
Why not plan an actual date? Remember movies and popcorn? Even when we are not going “out,” we can go out for a date with our mate without leaving home. Movies and popcorn! Or a multi-course dinner. Or simply sitting out on the deck with a glass of wine for happy hour. You don’t need to hop on a cruise ship or plan an expensive night out. Sometimes all we need to do is deliberately be less busy. Or do a little something just for your mate. Make them feel special.
For me, it’s all about using our minds. (Those are our biggest sex organs.) Remember how fun it was to be dating? We’d look forward to the event with such wonderful anticipation! We’d plan where we’d go and what we’d do with great glee! It truly matters little what we do or what we wear or how our hair looks. To me, it matters most that we focus on each other. Time together. Joy shared. Letting each other know that we actually LIKE each other.
Especially after being with someone for many years, it becomes easy to take each other for granted. We can all very easily get caught up in being busy, busy, busy. We might lack patience with our mate. We might no longer truly listen when they share. We may not always use a particularly fond, nor respectful tone when speaking to them. We may demand, rather than politely asking for their assistance. Flames flicker… they sometimes burn high and sometimes burn low. If you sense the fire has gone out, re-ignite it!
So, I like thinking of National Date Your Mate Month as a time to reflect on everything that made our mate someone we liked dating. No one expects that butterflies-in-the-stomach feeling, and that’s okay. There’s something very wonderful about total comfortability with our lover and best friend. Try to remember what was most special about each other in that “wowza,” falling in love stage. There is no need for expense. Just focus on romance. And smile. You are both worth it.
(Image by Bingo Naranjo)